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fore bidden

FORE
now so
vulnerable
our diversity being
ignored
entitlement reigns
(rains)

evidence-
science-
based
(base)

//drop
the
bass
808
33″
not
45
in
your
face//

my transgendered
son
once a fetus
now
burgeoning
manhood
facing future
(not forbidden)

welcomed
bidden
(prayed for)
received
loved

bright
sun
(son)
future
BIDDEN

My response to 45’s “forbidden” words.  Fuck that.

Check out this bit of guerrilla art:  Love it!

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fractal wound

vulnerability

soft folds
(ripped open)

revealing

deep slash

bound

peer into darkness
(infinite landscape)

fractal wound
binding

like a river winding
through a canyon

he saw all worlds
contained

we both saw
Her

here.

now.

Ekphrastic poem inspired by the Hana Hamplová: Meditations on Paper exhibit at The Frye Art Museum.   I saw it once, alone, and once with a date.   We both marveled at the raw eroticism of these photos.   No idea if that was the intent.

These photos are a reminder to me of the ephemeral nature of life.  Of bodies, words, ideologies.    Flesh changes throughout our lives, a constant reminder of change.  Once tight it becomes thinner but also softer, revealing new worlds beneath.  Discovery always awaits attention.

I recommend this exhibit which ends December 31st.  It’s truly beautiful and thought-provoking.

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changing the room of my mind

There’s so much I want to say.  So much I could say about friendship, and belonging, and how care (or the absence of it) feels deep in the center of my being.  About feeling dehumanized so often.  Objectified.  Plunked into the fantasies and projections of men who said they loved me but didn’t show me care.

I could talk about how my ache for belonging has led me to saying yes when I knew it should be a “no”.  About how finding the courage to finally say “no” meant being cast out.  Shut out.  (Or worse.)

About how that makes me not trust anyone, especially myself.

I will write about those things and more. I  know there are others who need to these stories but today, just for today, I’ll linger on the sweet sustenance of this poem by Hafiz and just let my heart rest deep inside my animal body.

“All the Hemispheres
Leave the familiar for a while.
Let your senses and bodies stretch out

Like a welcomed season
Onto the meadow and shores and hills.

Open up to the Roof.
Make a new watermark on your excitement
And love.

Like a blooming night flower,
Bestow your vital fragrance of happiness
And giving
Upon our intimate assembly.

Change rooms in your mind for a day.

All the hemispheres in existence
Lie beside an equator
In your heart.

Greet Yourself
In your thousand other forms
As you mount the hidden tide and travel
Back home.

All the hemispheres in heaven
Are sitting around a fire
Chatting

While stitching themselves together
Into the Great Circle inside of
You.”

~Hafiz

Update:  After I wrote this, I went to yoga with one of my favorite teachers, Ashley.  At the end of class, she put my head in her hands and gently said, “I’ve got you girl.”  Quiet tears rolled down my cheeks.

Trust is earned but we have to remember to open to it.  Opening…

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casting spells of liberation

He found this tiny black feather and gave it to me.  He said he thought it was a crow feather and told me not to cast a spell with it.  Ha!  I told him that even if I did cast a spell, it would be good magic, it would be in service to love and liberation.

So here we go.  Let’s cast a little spell together.   I’ve put the feather on a piece of art infused with intention.  A little bricolage.  This is similar to the mantra my yoga teacher said in hot yoga the other day. A spell is a prayer is a mantra.

May all beings be peaceful.
May all beings be happy.
May all beings be well.
May all beings be safe.
May all beings be wild and free.

And so it is.