A Ten-Minute Play by Kymberlee della Luce

Britney: Young woman in early twenties. Thin, lovely and well-dressed

Kaitlin: Young woman in early twenties. Wearing restaurant uniform with “flair”. Friends with Britney.

Bob: Young man. Wholesome and earnest. “Bystander”

ACT I

Scene 1

This is invisible theater to be acted out in a coffee shop where many people are congregated in an intimate way.  Bob is sitting at a table  reading the Holy Bible.  Britney and Kaitlin are seated a table near the line having a conversation.  On the table next to their coffee is a Louis Vuitton purse.

BRITNEY:  

Yeah, so can you BELIEVE how gorgeous this is?  It’s just like the one I saw Lindsay Lohan sporting in People magazine.  Tres chic, no? 

kaitlin:

It’s GORGEOUS, girl!  

(Kaitlin picks it up and inspects with enthusiasm)

How the hell did you pay for this anyway?  I mean, um…you’re a student, Britney, and you told me your dad cut off your allowance when you ran up his credit card last quarter.  Did you get a new job you haven’t told me about?

BRITNEY:

Well…ummm..not exactly.  I guess you could call it a job.  

(looks around a bit and lowers voice)

A friend from school told me about this way to make money….um…so I answered an ad on Craigslist for escort services.  It said I could get paid good money for being taken out to dinner and stuff.  It said it was perfect for students and it is!  Do you see this blouse?  Dolce and Gabana, $500.  These Gucci sunglasses were $500 and paid for them!

KAITLIN:

Britney, are you saying you’re an escort?  Doesn’t that mean…

BRITNEY:

Look, I know what you’re thinking.  It’s…well, it’s not that bad.  It’s kind of weird sometime to go out with older guys and stuff but I get to go out on the town, have fun and get paid.  I can buy all the things for MYSELF that my fucking father won’t.  

(louder now)

It still pisses me off that everything was fine until I got into college and HE got a new wife.  I mean, I’m used to nice things and now he won’t pay for them so I have other guys who will. Whatever.

KAITLIN looks at Britney with shock

What?  What’s that look for?  I mean, come on.  You have guys who you date who pay for the meal, right?  You have sex with them and they pay for your dinner.  How is this any different?  

KAITLIN:

(loudly) I do not do that, actually.  When I date guys, I make it a point to go Dutch for that very reason.  No expectations, just companionship.  In case you haven’t noticed, I have a job 

KAITLIN points to flair on her uniform

It may not pay all that great, but at least it’s honest!  Jesus Christ!

Bob turns around in his chair to talk to the women.

Bob:

Excuse me, ladies, could you please keep it down?  I am offended by your using of the Lord’s name in vain.  Further, I couldn’t help but hear what you were talking about.  Young woman, I am very concerned for your soul.

BRITNEY:

(loudly) Fuck off, bible thumper.  I am not interested in what you have to say about my soul.

BOB:

The Lord Jesus Christ can offer you salvation.  You are a sinner but there is hope.  

KAITLIN:

Look, dude.  um…thanks for your concern. We were having a private conversation, okay?  Britney, calm the F down, okay?  

BRITNEY:

Calm down?  Why should I?  Am I supposed to be ashamed that I exchange pussy for purses? Is that such a SIN?  I give them what they want, I get what I want.  So what?  I just don’t have to become some kind of desperate housewife to get there.  I see myself as a businesswoman.

BRITNEY gets a little louder and more animated.

What about everyone in here?  Who in this place do you think has never seen the “exchange” in love and sex? How the hell else am I supposed to survive?  How am I supposed to pay for the lifestyle I’m used to if my parents won’t support me and I can’t support myself yet?  

KAITLIN:

Um…Brit, look, why don’t you try to calm down, okay?  

KAITLIN looks apologetically at the patrons and the Barista (assuming attention has been raised), grabs Britney’s hands and talks in a measured voice.

KAITLIN:

Look, sweetie, I hear what you’re saying but what you’re doing is dangerous business.  I am going to school with a woman who works for a homeless shelter.  She’s told me about girls who started out in the burbs and ended up selling their bodies and becoming heroin addicts.  This isn’t something to mess around with.  Seriously.

BRITNEY:

I know what I’m doing, okay?  I have a plan.

BOB:

Let me tell you about God’s plan for your life.  You’ve sinned but it’s not too late.  You can have redemption!

BRITNEY:

Oh really?  Do tell.  How exactly DOES a woman make it?  I have my living expenses, hair, clothes, and all the other stuff that I’m used to having?  How do I make in this world?  I don’t know what else to do! (starts crying)

KAITLIN:

Look, dude, thanks for your concern for her soul, okay?  Really.  I need to have a talk with my friend now.  I don’t think this is something you or God can help with right now.

BOB:

Jesus is your salvation!  He can help.  Give your life to Jesus and His kingdom is yours.

KAITLIN:

No offense, but that’s now what’s needed right now.  Please just go away and stop talking to us.

BOB:

John 3:16…

BRITNEY:

SHUT UP!  Do you hear me?  Just SHUT THE FUCK UP!  I had that shit crammed down my throat when I was a kid and guess what?  The preacher who sold it to me..he..he..well let’s just say he liked meA LOT, okay? Just leave me alone!  I may take care of myself in “sinful ways” but at least I’m honest about it.  At least I’m getting something out of the deal this time.

KAITLIN:

Um…Britney, I’m sorry. (looking around the cafe)  I didn’t know. I…um…let’s just go, okay?

Kaitlin takes Britney by the arm and they quickly leave.

THE END