Today’s randomly chosen word is alone and comes from The Complete Collected Poems of Maya Angelou. It’s interesting that my random process brought this word because, despite being surrounded by people I had a false sense of feeling alone this morning, of feeling like nobody cares about me or that I have to do this life thing all alone. That anxious voice inside that convinces me that there is something lacking in my life.
I used to think that I didn’t suffer from anxiety but realized that, for me, it manifests in feelings of isolation and tends to get stuck in my body. An anagram of “anxiety” is “an exit”. Noticing that anxiety exists helps me to find a portal for it to leave–an exit. This Bricolage Project is doing that for me. As art making often does, it’s taking me out of the endlessly looping thoughts and into the present moment where I am okay with being alone. Okay with just being here noticing without expectations or a need to be or do something in particular.
My rule for this piece was that whatever ended up in the frame had to remind me of the goodness in my life. The coins are there because I found them while biking today. The picture I took many years ago with a polaroid camera that I eventually gave away to someone who needed it more than I did, and everything else has been given to me.
So far, making the rule has been my favorite part of this experience. I tend to prefer my own rules, generally speaking. 😉
Today’s quote comes from Maya Angelou:
There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.