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right here, right now


The girls and I were hanging out at the Seattle Center yesterday after school. It was a cold, autumn day and enormous gusts of wind had been blowing maple, birch and oak leaves all over the ground. The entire day seemed infused with a kind of magic that seemed carried on the wind.

As Gigi and I walked from Antioch University to the Seattle Center to meet up with Alexandra, I noticed a helicopter was about to take off from the roof of a news building. I pointed it out and she asked if we could stop and watch. We did. As it flew away, she exclaimed, “This is the most amazing day ever! That is one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen!” I was glad we stopped.

We went inside and visited the Seattle Children’s Museum for a bit before going back outside to wait for their dad to pick them up so I could go back to Antioch for class. It had been raining but the sun was shining and everything was glistening and beautiful. The bright, pink blaze of the EMP building beckoned us so we decided to head over there and walk the labyrinth. As I was walking toward it, drinking in the beautiful oddness that is the EMP building, the music they blast out of their speakers and some public art pieces nearby, I thought what an amazing, inspiring city I live in. We have so much public art and, right in the heart of the city, a beautiful labyrinth to walk. We have urban gardens everywhere and a thriving arts scene. We are so blessed.

So, I begin my journey on the labyrinth, one of two I have walked in my city recently. As I start to walk, I ask Spirit for a message. I ask to be guided for the greater good. As I’m walking, I notice Alexandra ends up right behind me. I let her pass because I know I will feel either rushed or confined if she is right behind me. She moves ahead. Soon, Gigi decides to run into the middle randomly and begins walking back out, chattering the whole time. Each time Alexandra passes me going on her loop, she reaches out to touch my hand. At first, their entire presence just annoys me. I think how much easier my spiritual path would be without my kids. I think how often I am interrupted or my plans get truncated due to illness, play dates, shopping for new shoes or just whatever. I decide to just notice these feelings, not judge them and keep walking.

I continue to walk and breathe. The air is so clean and everything feels so positively charged from the rain and wind! I begin to notice the beautiful puddles along the way and the glorious colors of the maple leaves that are scattered about. I keep walking and notice how joyful my children’s faces are when they look at me and how cute it is that they want to touch my hand as I walk. Alexandra tells me that she hears my phone ringing. Yes, I am walking the labyrinth to get my Message From The Universe and my fucking phone is ringing. Naturally, it is her dad who is calling to say he will be late picking us up. I say okay and hang up feeling incredibly peaceful (this is not normal in these moments) and keep walking.

I arrive in the middle and the girls are waiting for me. I am waiting for My Important Message when a really fun rockabilly song comes on at the EMP. We begin to dance. We dance separately at first and then begin to hold hands, dancing and spinning and laughing. I am full up with joy as I watch my children’s rosy cheeks and shining eyes. We stand there and sing loudly letting our voices echo against the crazy looking building and laugh.

As we walk out, the girls take off before me and go quickly. I’m starting to feel frustrated with having boots on so I take them off and continue my journey with bare feet. It’s cold but that’s how I like it. As I walk, time slips away. My kids wait for me, Gigi exclaiming, “Mom! You’re almost there!” As I finish the walk into the arms of my children, I realize that I got the message quite clearly. The journey is right here, right now and we’re on it together. I can choose to be cranky, annoyed and restless or I can choose to have fun and enjoy the moment. That is the Divine Feminine in action. The immanence of Her is the Now in the flesh.

There isn’t really any place else I need to be.

One last thing: Just as we finished the walk, the helicopter that we saw take off earlier landed. How is that for a metaphor?

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